WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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