thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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