So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
