Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
