You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I wish i was in the wii world.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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