so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I will be naked everywhere
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
