I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
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