Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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