i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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