That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Randomize
