come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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