the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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