Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
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