Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Randomize
