I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
did you just send me my own nude
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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