:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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