Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
