I will die if light touches me.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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