Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
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