Texts From Last Night

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  (804): View more from Virginia

  i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life

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  (804): i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life http://tfl.nu/us99
  Replies (4) Good night (580) Bad night (2775) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.

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  (281): I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian. http://tfl.nu/ky2c
  Replies (51) Good night (3491) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.

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  (918): Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building. http://tfl.nu/yoz8
  Replies (44) Good night (5946) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?

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  (727): Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose? http://tfl.nu/qulw
  Replies (112) Good night (1076) Bad night (15930) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me

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  (610): we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me http://tfl.nu/jltn
  Replies (49) Good night (613) Bad night (6493) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.

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  (720): Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands. http://tfl.nu/3psd
  Replies (19) Good night (1278) Bad night (4232) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.

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  (423): I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger. http://tfl.nu/nz2t
  Replies (10) Good night (2875) Bad night (928) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.

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  (804): just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast. http://tfl.nu/1dh4
  Replies (3) Good night (1125) Bad night (405) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.

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  (210): I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful. http://tfl.nu/5n8j
  Replies (7) Good night (1716) Bad night (648) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.

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  (218): I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday. http://tfl.nu/vjch
  Replies (4) Good night (1287) Bad night (349) Order T-Shirt
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five

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  (928): I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five http://tfl.nu/12yz
  Replies (3) Good night (750) Bad night (264) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.

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  (+61): Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me. http://tfl.nu/7l1e
  Replies (2) Good night (615) Bad night (234) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk

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  (630): Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk http://tfl.nu/5as6
  Replies (1) Good night (924) Bad night (240) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!

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  (801): I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner! http://tfl.nu/dody
  Replies (4) Good night (564) Bad night (239) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?

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  (815): is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal? http://tfl.nu/lpf5
  Replies (14) Good night (524) Bad night (290) Order T-Shirt

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