weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
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