So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
