Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I queefed so loud it echoed.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
