She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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