Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
