My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
