I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I'm passing your future prison.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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