So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
