Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
