i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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