I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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