Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
