: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
