Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
