Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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