the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
