Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Randomize