Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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