How'd it feel making her break her religion?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
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