If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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