i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize