Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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