I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Randomize
