Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
