she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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