Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(601): View more from Mississippi

I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?

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(307): View more from Wyoming

Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.

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(518): View more from New York

Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?

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(217): View more from Illinois

it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....

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(520): View more from Arizona

Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him

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(586): View more from Michigan

He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.

(248): View more from Michigan

Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.

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(772): View more from Florida

So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.

(1-772): View more from Florida

That was random, even for you Mom.

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(718): View more from New York

You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.

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