oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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