May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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