You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize