Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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