She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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