Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Randomize
